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‘I don’t know why James plays along with you brainy types! It gets right on my tits. Fran, this is just like that bloody stupid argument you had with him, remember? What a waste of time that was! Let’s just tell Madam Nosy-Parker here to piss off back where she came from so we can get back down and dirty with James.’ Laura was not the woman to be deterred by this sort of interruption. ‘Thank you for that helpful intervention,’ she said disdainfully. ‘But I’m not going anywhere until I’ve got to the bottom of what’s going on here.’ ‘What’s the big mystery?’ demanded Connie. ‘We all fancy James like mad. So we fuck him. That’s all there is to it. The only mystery is how people that are supposed to be brainy can make such hard work out of something that’s so … fucking … simple!’ (She pronounced the final three words with a rising intonation and very slowly, as if each were a sentence by itself.) ‘It’s not intelligence, Connie,’ I told her. ‘It’s education.’ ‘Is it?’ said Connie, still. The door yielded him entry with a noisy squeak of very rusty hinges. He stepped quickly into the shop, closing the door behind him. The store was quite dingy; cobwebs appeared to be the primary decoration along the shelves lining the exterior walls of the store. A single electric bulb, hanging bare from the ceiling fixture, was the sole illumination in the room. Directly opposite the front door was a curtained opening to what Walter assumed must be the storage room for the little shop. "Not exactly the Ritz," Walter muttered under his breath. "Make ye not fun of th' stoore," rasped a voice from behind Walter, pronouncing the "o" in "store" with an "ooo" sound rather than the long "o" sound Walter was expecting to hear. "A damn foreigner," Walter thought to himself as he stared at the wizened woman walking to him through the shadows. "How I help ye, Waltair Muyrgeetsoon?" "A Slavic accent," Walter thought, "probably Romanian or..." "Czech," finished the woman. She was old beyond.
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