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When I moved away to teach I began having doubts. Would he be the only one I ever was intimate with? The longer we were apart, the more curious I became. Plus, no matter how much I hinted that I needed to be told what to do, he never caught on. I realized he was too nice to treat me like the submissive slut I fantasized about. I myself didn't understand it, but I craved being told what to do, to just let go and be submissive. It was the complete opposite of how I lived the rest of my life where I had to be in control of everything. Things had to be perfect and structured. I needed order to be comfortable or I stressed out. I admit it, I am somewhat high maintenance. That was probably why I craved the complete letting go in the bedroom, but Mike never caught on to my many obvious hints.MikeDating lots of women over the past three years I learned a lot and one thing I learned is that often women in positions of power or authority often are very submissive in the bedroom. I wondered on. There’d been a lot of comment on TV and in the newspapers about “the first lesbian kiss” being shown on a British soap. The girls reckoned that it was no big deal, but the conversation developed into why it was that men were so turned on by watching females having a physical relationship – even just kissing.“You never see men kissing or cuddling on TV” said Marie “I reckon it’s sex discrimination. I mean you can see a girl’s tits or arse any night of the week, but I’ve never seen a man’s arse, never mind a cock, on TV.”“That’s true,” said Anne, “I mean you and I see men naked in hospital regularly but how many women have ever seen a naked man other than the one they are married to? Men can buy nudie magazines with explicit, almost gynaecological, photographs but where is there a magazine with pictures of big hard cocks”?“Yeah,” Marie shouted “Let’s see more cocks. Why are they so reluctant to get their kit off and show us what they’ve got between their legs?”“They’re not all.
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