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It hurt me when she sprang it on me, more than she realised, more than I let her see. It did make me think, and thinking got me through.”“It’s part of why she loves you.”“What was it you said a minute ago? Shamelessly naked? What did you mean?”“I told you we met in a store changing room. When she stripped she wasn’t discreet, like a lot of women would have been. She was out front with it, more than showing off, being brazen. Like she didn’t give a damn about who saw; know what I mean?”“I think I know what you mean, but she doesn’t do that with me. I’ve had a glimpse once or twice, like the first few times we went clubbing.”“She loves you, she’s desperate to stay with you, so she tones it down to fit what she thinks you expect. She needs your approval. With other guys she doesn’t care, it’s take-it-or-leave-it. If they disapprove they can fuck off.”“I had an idea, something to kick off changing things when she comes home. Something you said triggered an idea.”“What did I say?”“I think. I said, ‘It’s important that I know.’ He nodded and said, ‘You want to know how long I’ve been watching for you?’ ‘YES!’ He said, ‘It’s like a dream that I’m not watching you again tonight. I used to work here. I noticed you even though I only worked in the kitchen. During my break I’d sit and watch you. At first because I was watching everyone. But soon I would look for you…always looking beautiful…one night windswept…one night looking serious and deep in thought.’ He moved his hand toward mine. I sensed he wanted to touch me as he spoke. I wasn’t going to move toward him until I knew the whole story. His hand stopped moving and he continued, ‘Another night you looked full of sadness that I ached to comfort you. One night you were grading papers. The night you walked in with a guy, I was so jealous that I knew I had to meet you.’ I was flabbergasted but let him continue, remembering how each of those nights I had felt so alone, but had found solace in my evening trips to the.
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