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It has littleslightly darker corners where her sissy husband to be can hide. Yes! Iknow! Mistress wants to marry me. I pinch myself daily to remind me Iam not dreaming - no dream could be as wonderful as this. But later,for now I have seemingly failed. She asks me to buy her a fruit juice(she is driving) and I stutter, and obey. Nothing for me. She tells meI have not exactly measured up to her expectations "Not really darling,have you?" What can I say? She is right - she's always right, butthat's another story! Actually, she seems distracted, I half turn tolook over my shoulder at what has her attention. "Don't move darling.I'll tell you when you can look".She tells me she is bursting and must go to the loo. I ask - I beg! -to accompany her. But she merely smiles, and uses those eyebrows on me(now I'm jelly - this is so unfair) and disappears behind me. I ammindful that I should not look where I am forbidden. I remain desolate,I have failed. But then, "I'm sorry sweet sissy" (she's. The fact that I hadn't believed her had nothing to do with the absolute truth that I really wished I could have.I tried to talk myself into going over there and giving her my version of an apology. I wasn't successful in doing that. I appreciated what Joyce was saying though. I knew that what she wanted me to do would make our future life together easier, just as it had done in the past. I had to decide whether I cared more about trying to achieve harmony within the complicated framework of our unusual family grouping, or whether I should continue on with my current position.I favored the more rigid position of me holding everyone else accountable for living up to some fairly standard set of values. On the other hand, I already knew Brenda wasn't going to change the way she looked at things. Something like this, if I allowed it to continue, could end up in a life altering tragedy. I could avert this happening, at least this time, by tendering her the meaningless and empty apology she.
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