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." Oh," my daughter said again, still not looking in my direction."So ... I'm just kinda upset, Kira..." Sorry, Mom ... maybe," she said much quieter, "maybe this is sorta my fault..." What?" I exclaimed, "however do you figure that?"Kira shrugged, paused a long time before speaking, "cause I've let him take mine for a while..."I was speechless. Was my daughter really telling me that she'd let her brother use her panties to masturbate? I just stared at the side of her head. The panties fell from my loose fingers. "You ... what?" I finally exclaimed, exasperated, not believing what she'd said."I dunno ... he just ... asked one day ... a couple of years ago ... I didn't really know why, I just thought he was being silly..."I tried to grasp what was going on, failing utterly to hide my shock as Kira finally turned back to face me."I'm sorry, Mom ... I kinda knew what he was doing ... eventually. But," she shrugged, looking solemn, "I didn't care..." Didn't ... care?" I stared at Kira's. I don't know what came over me." You never have to apologise to me for crying, Josh," Miss Stevenssoothed as we returned to our positions on opposite sides of her desk. "Ithink it's very healthy to have a good cry now and again, process ouremotions and aim to step forward. I hate the culture of men not beingallowed to cry - it's very toxic; leads to pent-up emotions beingprocessed poorly. Ironically, having the freedom to cry makes one muchhappier in my opinion. I feel you're someone who's not been allowed tocry before, aren't you Josh? Even when you've really wanted to? Perhapswhen your mother left?" Thank you, Miss Stevens. Yes, Miss Stevens," I replied meekly. Thememory of mum leaving built up inside me, teetering on the brink oftriggering more tears, but this time I managed to control it."Did you want to talk more about her at all today?" Miss Stevens inquiredtentatively. I shook my head. "Okay," she continued solemnly. "I won'tmention her again unless you do, sweetie. I would.
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