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I had sort of resolved not to do sex things with aman. But be reasonable. That was before I knew how great it all wouldbe.Anyway, Aunt Tricia was a sweetie who knew just what I needed hairwise.She showed me a bunch of photos of styles until we agreed that thebestone for me was a volume bob with sideswept bangs. It was very femininewith a whiff of boyishness. Just like me. And it was easy tomaintain.I took a nice hot shower, then put on a robe and settled in for myhaircut, manicure/pedicure, and makeup makeover.They faced me away from the mirrors and a good thing. I wanted to bestunned all at once by the beautiful beauty I beheld when they hadfinished.I wondered what Eric would say when he saw me looking all contemporary.Would he want to ravage me? Ravaging sounded great at that moment,though I still had no idea what that involved.Before I got dressed in the clothes Eric had packed for me, we had alight lunch and I got to chat with Aunt Tricia and her girls. Lovelypeople. . When I asked Gwen about it once, if she was that excited for herbirthday, she told me that what the pictures showed was her happiness.Hers, not anybody else's, not a reflection or interpretation of anotherperson's emotions, but her own for the first time she could remember.For the next couple years things were normal. She was able to enroll inschool again, go to slumber parties and dance class, just live the lifeof an average girl like she always wanted. You would've been hard pressedto find a more cheerful, outgoing kid.So of course, as abruptly as things changed before, was how quickly theydid again. This is the part that Gwen never told me the details ofherself, but her mother let slip to me once, that right after she hadgotten her first period was when they realized something was wrong.It was her mother who noticed it first. The irritability, fatigue,unexpected crying jags, not Gwen, but herself, and also seemingly Gwen'sfather too. Classic PMS symptoms, but that wouldn't explain.
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