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Who had I become, kneeling before a guy because he was popular, and because my sister idolized him? Who had I become to have sucked his friends, simply because he asked me to? Who had I become to have let my boyfriend arrange for me to have sex with other guys? And what had I become, to have gone to the hotel with him, and having agreed to be with a coach at my school? Worst of all, of everything I had done, what had I become to hurt the one person who was there for me through all of it, standing by me and supporting me, yet I let her down by getting back with an ex-boyfriend who had dumped me and who she believed had arranged for her to be attacked. I was no one, that’s who I was. I was dirty and worthless and slutty. I had shamed my sister, my father and my mother. I had shamed my best friend. But mostly I had shamed myself. I went into the bathroom and ran a very hot bath. As hot as I thought I could stand. I filled the tub as full as I dare fill it to where it would. Fingers exploring and touching between my legs. I moaned from the sensation I felt and in my still sleepy, foggy mind thought it was just a dream. A very pleasurable dream.Here I am again.I thought I was only dreaming again of the man in my dreams. I moaned as I received kisses on my lips. It felt so real, hot and consuming. Kissing him back his tongue explored inside my mouth searching for my tongue. When he found it he started sucking and licking my tongue and lower lips.His lips traveled down south on my body to my ear, on my neck, on my shoulder, softly nipping and sucking everything his lips passed by. He continued his exploration going down on my waiting breast like a hungry baby sucking my hard nipples.His hot wet lips tasted one after another while his hand lightly squeezed and the other roamed on my tummy down to my mound, flicking his fingers on my hard knob and the now flowing wetness, feeling how wet I was, his finger dipping inside me. I moaned again and lifted my hips.
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