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.. unless you’ve been in space. The first time I ran into a humanoid female with no breasts it was a real shock. I sort of expected that all humanoids would have tits. It turns out that on a lot of planets, the teats only swell up when the mother needs milk for her offspring. I got over it pretty fast because the other thing I discovered about the flat-chested females was that they really preferred it from behind– either hole. They thought front-to-front sex was weird. You had to pay extra for that.I never did get used to the four-breasted females on Runella Nine. They absolutely demanded missionary position only, and those extra tits rubbing against my lower abdomen just creeped me out. I almost couldn’t “perform.” Fred thought that was really funny.Last time I was on Terra for planet leave, Fred actually bought me a round. It was the good stuff, evidently kept out of sight behind the bar. I don’t know where they got it, but it wasn’t quasi. It was real.I hadn’t tasted real ale since. Most of the brown skinned folks below the Texas line didn't consider it anything other than another river in the way of their travels even if the Texas folks were of a different opinion.He had thrown in with a scraggly wild bunch from Laredo just because one of them was downright bodacious on the little harmonica he always kept in his pocket. There wasn't nothing Dutch liked better than to listen to the old time tunes on the melodious thing. He always wanted to play the harmonica but his mama told him he was just like his old man and couldn't carry a tune to save his ass.His mount was a sometimes sassy mix of pinto and appaloosa which didn't make any sense to any fella that prided hisself on knowing something about horseflesh. He had tagged the devious thing "Corky" because of the way the nasty thing went into a corkscrew twirl whenever it was of a mind first thing in the morning. Dutch swore he couldn't figure how the tired looking nag got all that energy up so early in the day.
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