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He didn’t say anything after that and neither did I. I just held her hand letting her come to grips with what the doctor had told us. What was there left to say? Our parents visited her the following morning and she was better, but only on the outside. Everyone cried and said how sorry they were but I found the word sorry had lost a lot of its luster—it just didn’t seem to be enough. Heather spent hours staring at the ceiling, all the while I sat on the chair next to her bed holding her hand. The hospital chaplain came in that afternoon and asked if she wanted to talk. She just looked at him, then shook her head no. She was grieving. I took her home on Wednesday and put her right to bed. She hadn’t said more than a few words, even to me, but the last thing in the world I wanted to discuss with her right now was the baby we’d lost. On Friday, when I had to go back to work, her mother came over for a few hours and kept an eye on her for me. Heather took a month leave of absence from. In those stalls I couldn't drop my panties too low aspeople might see them looking under the door or wall. Another this isthe distinct female hissing peeing sound I now make. A sound that youwouldn't hear at any men's room. Or what to think about the specificsound of removing the hygiene pads from my panties. And last but notleast the strong smell of pussy when peeing. Before this whole ordeal Icould always tell if a woman used the toilet because of the strongsmell. Some parts of the month this smell is even worse. This made mevery self-conscious. Another greatest hit: It must have been the secondor third time that I had my period and I forgot to bring tampons withme. I felt my panties dampen and I had to rush to the toilets to preventanything worse. That's the first time I used the ladies room as I hopeto find a tampon vending machine and was lucky to find a box of thestuff at the cabinet. Since that moment I use the ladies room at work. Ijust make sure none sees me going in and.
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