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And I don't care." Remember that Halloween party we went to?" She finally asked. "Right before we stopped being friends?"I stopped in my tracks as the vivid memories rushed in from the dark corners of my mind. I didn't forget them, even thought I tried to erase them. "What does this have to do--" The one where we played spin the bottle and you kissed me?"My heart started to beat faster. The scene played through my head again; the scene that had played several times for the whole week after it happened."Yeah," I shrugged. "I was just playing the game." Were you? Or were you just playing me?"I cocked my head in confusion. "Look, I don't understand--" You don't even fucking get it," She huffed. "Whatever," She muttered and threw herself on the couch, brushing her hair aside. Being curious, I followed and sat next to her. The black skirt she was wearing rode up on her thighs. She crossed one leg over the other and I noticed her black knee socks.I couldn't take the silence and risked. Before, when you were the other way, all of us loved seeing him do that. We wanted all the boys to grow up to be just like their father. Now, that's more of a fear than a hope. You tell all of us how much having your children living with you would mean to you, but then you say and do things that make us all afraid of what you might do if you ever lost your temper around them." I'd never hurt any of them!" I had tried so hard to keep my end of the bargain. I couldn't let her accuse me of possibly injuring the children though. I hadn't meant to scream my denial at her, but it just came roaring out of me like that. Joyce had pushed back in her chair at the suddenness of my outburst, and had almost ended up tipping it over. I felt bad about my lack of self control. "I'm sorry. Go ahead, I'll be quiet and let you finish." Don't you see, Kenny? We all realize that you want to be a good husband and father again. That's what we want too, but wanting it isn't enough. We've tried waiting, but.
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