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Soft. Glistening. Reflective. I feel someone, among the crowded room, put their hand into the small of my back. It slides up carefully–gently–to the nape of my neck and ushers me forward. I am caught in a moment of memory, my mind whirring back to a time I was a child, where my father would usher me along the same, the small of my back, or the nape of my neck as if to say, ‘Run along now, go play with your friends.’. This isn’t my father though, but as I try to turn and see who it is, a hand swiftly pushes my face forward. Not so much as a glimpse of the stranger behind me. Suddenly I feel the muzzle of a gun in the small of my back. ‘Don’t turn around. Keep walking.’ A gentle, remorseful man’s voice sighs. Suddenly, the world becomes colorless to me. The room is as black and white as the tuxedos and gowns that fill it, and everything in my pockets feels ten times too heavy. I reach for my cigarette case, feeling the cool metal of sterling silver. I can feel the etched design, and I. "I'm your son." He actually falls silent at that. "Dad, please. Just trust me this time. You wanna ground me, fine, you can ground me 'til I'm twenty-one. Just please do it ta'morrah. Look, I'm sorry, but I gotta go now." I hang up. That's probably my ass; he's like as not to kill me when he gets home. But if Alex is still alive when he does it, I'll deal.When I get back downstairs, everything's too quiet. In the tub, Alex is curled up into a ball, arms around his knees, shoulders shaking. Very quickly, it's all becoming too much for me - I can't watch him cry on top of everything else. I undress, very aware on one hand that I'm about to share a bath with a guy for the first time since I was like ten. On the other hand, I know I'm only marginally warmer than he is and I should be in a hot tub as well. Besides, right now, I'd do almost anything to hear him tell me to 'fuck off' - say anything normal and 'Alex-y'.I get in the tub - the water is still brutally hot - and pull him close to.
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