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" You are indeed, Norman." You're shattered, Nick. No don't argue. You are. You've picked Liverpool up from the depths and transformed it. Yes?" Well..." Don't be silly, Nick. You have and we're all grateful and proud of you. Why do you think you were asked to a director? Because Head Office recognised you as a leader and innovator."Nick shrugged deprecatingly."So you've got to go on being one and this paper you're writing shows you are but you're finding it difficult whereas a few weeks ago you were fired with enthusiasm for it. So what's gone wrong?"Nick shrugged again."You've run out of steam, Nick. You haven't taken a proper break since you arrived here and you had the additional burden of Sally's mother." That wasn't a problem."Norman looked at him sternly and Nick had to look down."You fell in love and got married." What's that got to do with it?"Norman smiled. "Oh, I know. Love makes everything in the garden wonderful but, while your emotions may run high and make so many. I’m not very good at being passive. Arms are next. As she works, I recall how I once hated my upper arms, how I wouldn’t wear sleeveless tops even on sweltering summer days. She somehow senses this and asks, ‘Did I trigger a memory?’ ‘Baggage,’ I admit. ‘Good riddance.’ ‘Gotcha. This isn’t easy for you. I can tell.’ Is it that obvious? I don’tknow how to respond, so I do what I typically do in those situations: I retreat. I tiptoe away, leaving my body to enjoy her touch without the interference of my mind. Alone in my little emotional cave, safe and dark, I wonder why I invest so much energy into hiding my insecurities. In so doing, what do I achieve? More importantly, perhaps, what do I lose? The deepest, most fulfilling relationships I’ve ever known are those in which I bare those insecurities—or, at the very least, am willing to do so. Is there any love deeper than the absence of fear? ‘You’re doing great, though.’ Her voice follows me into my mind cavern. My body is sinking into.
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