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Many touted their own trophy wife. But Mom was different. Aside from being beautiful, she had a rebel flair and an innate sensuality about her. She was famous around town for having kicked one guy in the groin after he cut her off in traffic and stole her car park outside Whole Foods. Another time, we were paying for gas at the service station when the man serving us couldn’t stop gawking at her cleavage. “Careful Ed,” she said reading his name tag with a bemused smirk on her face, “you’ll sprain your eyes”. He turned bright red and undercharged us by accident. But I know what you’re thinking. ‘That’s it? You slept with your stepmom because she’s hot and you didn’t get on with your Dad?’Well, kind of. But if she was your stepmom, you would have tried to bang her too. And if you think that’s bad, I haven’t even told you the worst part yet. Trust me, I don’t try and fool myself. I’m under no illusions. What happened that summer’s afternoon will stay with me for the rest of my days.But,. The restaurant certainly deserved its exemplary reputation. We started with a bottle of Veuve Cliquot non-vintage champagne, my absolute favourite. Mum and I jokingly called it Vivo click, because she couldn’t master the pronunciation of the correct name. Bless her. I had a starter of seared asparagus and scallops and followed it with a wonderful dish of poached wild salmon, flown in fresh that day from Scotland. This was accompanied by a fresh and fruity Pinot Gris. Chris of course, ever the carnivore, started with calves liver, followed by a huge filet of beef. What a caveman! He was obviously anticipating the need to maintain his strength I thought to myself. He opted for a glass of rich-red, Australian Shiraz. Good choice, I love Australian wines too.Neither of us bothered with dessert, instead, we skipped straight to a brandy for me and a single-malt for him. After conferring with the waiter, Chris stood, and like a proper gentleman, he pulled my chair back allowing me to stand..
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