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Uh, clean the garage.’ We chatted like this while we got the chores divided. I tried to make sure I didn’t win all the hands I dealt…. You see, this was the night my plan would go into action. The book I’d sent for was on how to cheat at cards, and I had been practicing. It was working like a charm. All through the game, every time it was my deal, I was faking the shuffle, running up hands, nullifying the cut, and dealing seconds and bottoms out the wazoo–and Millie didn’t have a clue. After we started playing for fucks–we had started calling it what it was, instead of ‘forfeits’–I was biding my time, waiting till I could run up exactly the hands I wanted. By the time it happened, I owed her a full-body oil massage with a tit-milking fuck (tragic loss, that), a blindfolded, no-hands pussy-eating, and I would be getting the mail in my underwear all week. She owed me two blowjobs, a soapy handjob in the shower, a naked bouncy-fuck squatting on my dick, plus washing the car in a. No plan survives the first contact intact.All five second grenade fuses will burn down in three seconds.Try to look unimportant because the bad guys may be low on ammo.If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.The important things are always simple.The simple things are always hard.The easy way is always mined.If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.Incoming fire has the right of way.Friendly fire – isn't.If the enemy is in range, "'SO ARE YOU".No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.Beer math is: two beers times 37 men = 49 cases.Things that must be together to work, usually can't be shipped together.Radio's will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.Anything you do can get you shot – including doing nothing.Tracers work both ways.The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming.
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