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“Oh ... I see- ... no, wait, what the fuck?” Brent said, clearly baffled and shaking his head.I sighed. “Yeah. What the fuck, indeed, Brent. What the fuck, indeed.”- - - -Brent’s bachelor party was arranged first. Brent’s best-man Andre was a bit miffed at not being allowed to plan it but Jess convinced Brent that it would be in his, and the whole group’s, best interest to allow her to arrange the shin-dig. While it was a bit weird letting his girlfriend’s best friend arrange that sort of thing, he also knew that it would undoubtedly by exponentially more interesting if she did.Emma wholeheartedly agreed, knowing full well the kind of debauchery that would ensue. She wouldn’t be attending, of course. It wasn’t that Emma would disapprove of anything that would happen, just that the other attendees would no doubt feel awkward with the bride-to-be watching. Understandable.Jess had lots planned and she asked Brent to trust her. And he did, implicitly.- - - -Brent’s contribution to the. Emotions that I had buried under selfish fun and sexual depravity erupted as explosively as an orgasm, but with no pleasure and peace to follow, just a towering wall of long-concealed grief for parents who had loved and cared for me, as I did for them, and yet they'd gone to their graves believing the very worst of me. Grief that I had pushed back and back with sex, drugs, visits to the House in the Woods, grief that could no longer be contained, because there was nowhere else for it to go.Margaret found me bawling my eyes out on the sofa, hugging the card to my chest, not letting her have it back even when she snapped at me. I had resisted her before, but with full knowledge of the consequences. This time I wasn't conscious of what I was doing. Pain filled my heart with such depth and concentration I could hardly breathe.Margaret quickly realised that I was in a similar dark place to where I had been after my morphine binge. Never one to be ready with easy sympathy or affection, she.
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