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”“What do you expect from an 18-year-old?” I laughed. “How old are you?”“32. I was born on Christmas Day 1982. I am the Brown Jesus!”“I was born in July 1983 so you're six months older than me.”“Wow. You have really nice tits you know. How come they're not all saggy like my mum's tits?”“Maybe because I haven't had k**s yet?! Dickhead!”Initially he told me he was from Kabul but that turned out to be a joke. In reality he was born in Leicester making him twice as English as me.Two weeks later and he was staying at my flat, he was still with Scarlett (just about) and we hadn't fucked although we had kissed a lot. I was getting impatient. “How about I give you a back massage?” I said.“I've got some coconut oil in the kitchen, I could melt it so it's body temperature and then rub it in to your poor tired body, how about that?”“Ooh! That would be amazing! Please don't stick anything up my bumhole though, I have issues.”I would like to point out at this juncture that we were both very, very. I should have killed you at that moment. You are all I have in my life. So please don’t make me do that.Neenu started to cry and ran to her room. It was just me and Ravi in the room. There was an awkward silence in the room.Ravi: you stay here Tom. I have to go talk to her.Saying this he went into her room. I stayed there for some time. I was embarrassed actually. After some half hour, Ravi came back. Neenu slowly followed him. I looked at Neenu. She was not looking at me. Ravi went into the kitchen and came back with a bottle of Scotch.He poured me a glass and sat on the sofa and asked me and Neenu to sit.Ravi: So Tom, my daughter tells me you two are not in a relationship, and never plan to get married.I had no reply. I looked at Neenu. Still not looking at me. I was surprised by how she told this to her dad.Ravi: So Tom, how are we going to settle this?Neenu looked at me and nodded to say something.Me: Uncle I don’t know what to say. It just happened all of a sudden. We both are.
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