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A retired man in his sixties probably shouldn't be behaving like this, problem is, I've never really lost the urge. If a beautiful woman makes a play for me, I just can't resist, no matter how guilty I feel about it afterwards.I arrive at the house and knock on the door. Di in a white blouse and navy flared trousers opens the door and notions me in. She's still chatting on the phone to my wife. "Oh its the plumber...I'll have to go in a minute and show him where the stop-cock is!" to which I hear laughter down the other end of the line. "Yes, the kitchen's straight through there." Di says for the benefit of my wife, "I'll be through in a mo..."I let my dog off the lead and he runs straight through the kitchen to play with Di's dog in the garden outside. Still on the phone Di walks up to me and grabs my cock through my trousers. "He's quite dishy actually!" she says to my other half, smiling coyly and winking at me. God! This is some bitch I'm dealing with here... I consider, but in. It would have felt very reassuring at that time had I known for certain that we were on the same side. Judging from what I saw on the display next though, it seemed like for some reason, we were like best buddies. But I could've sworn, on pain of anything other than death or excruciating torture involving genitalia, that I had never laid eyes on that man, or any of the other folks on the screen in my life; not even waiting in line for the cash register, or in one of those cult films on after-hours TV.Yet here I was, seeing myself in photos, playing cards with the Baron and the Pope, looking seriously drunk alongside a very healthy, yet still fat, gray-haired Elvis, and all very naturally it would seem, having birthday cake alongside the Queen of England. And that was just the people I could recognise: because there were hundreds of photos that I was in, wearing fatigues, those silly hats, examining crates of weird-looking stuff, some in exotic locations, others in what appeared to be.
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