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‘But if you’re really good you don’t need to use anything,’ I continued. We kept going back and forth with vaguely veiled food analogies for a while, discussing spices, pie and whip cream and how variety keeps things interesting. ‘Just all this talk of food is making me big,’ I texted. It was but it wasn’t my already slightly pudgy stomach I was really referring too. Something else was getting a bit larger while we continued to chat. ‘Why not chow down?’ asked Cathy. I didn’t respond, not knowing exactly what she meant. The course of the conversation changed for a few minutes as we talked about how sore we were from work and about Cathy’s trips to her massage therapist, her RMT. In one line of text, her phone’s autocorrect feature changed ‘RMT’ to ‘TNT’. ‘Dynamite?’ I texted. ‘Yep, rub it and it explodes.’ This wasn’t at all like me, and I was afraid that I was going to cross some sort of invisible line and not only end this conversation suddenly but maybe jeopardize a very. She hated it, telling him they needed a newer, modern home. He was stubborn, saying if it was good enough for his great grandfather, it was good enough for him. It was a constant bone of contention.’ ‘In their second year, she had their first son, twenty months later she had their second. He wanted a large family, but she thought two was enough, and secretly had her tubes tied, telling him the last child had messed up her uterus and there would be no more. He knew nothing about female anatomy, and didn’t think she would lie to him, so he accepted it.’ ‘When the oldest was around ten, she embarked on an affair with her doctor. He was also married, with four children.’ ‘They got careless, and his wife had him watched. Eric didn’t know a thing about it until the divorce action, when she was named as the reason for the breakup.’ ‘Edwina, Eric’s wife, denied it right up until the photos came to light. Then it was all over but the name calling and custody fight. And there was a lot of name.
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