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I guess it was good enough for my parents.I did not want to be like them though. I was a strict father like myown, but I always let my kids be themselves. However, it's hard to dealwith your kid being themselves, when you know that society will thescorn them for being true to themselves.I figured that was reason enough to discourage my son, but I wonderedwhat message I would be sending him. What would I really be saying tohim? What would he hear? If I was listening, I would hear what thosepeople told me when I was kid. My desires made me a freak or somethingworse. They made me not a man. It's hard enough to go through this worldwithout someone calling you a sissy because you happen to have anaffinity for women's clothes.I couldn't really support it. Could I? No, that would allow a stigma toattach to him. It's a vicious stigma that would give kids a reason toscorn him. Not like adults are that much better. I can hear my friendsmaking fun of me now for my sissy son. They'd probably. Millie and I still silently danced our dance of attraction, staying just outside the line. My fear was crossing that line and destroying our whole family construct. Millie couldn't think of betraying Mr. Bell that way. Our attraction was going to stay just that, an unfulfilled attraction.Sandra never really got over almost killing me in the shower. I didn't think she did much of anything but knock me off balance. She thought she almost killed me with her "uncontrolled lust." She still smiled, petted me, and even copped the odd feel, but never again did she approach me like that day in the shower.During one of our frequent rest periods, as we fully broke in our new home, Colleen and Rebecca talked about a trip to Sweden. Jennifer was still being treated, and now that I had my strength, they knew how badly I wished to check up on her."Why don't we all fly over, and after spending some time with Jennifer, we could catch up to Daddy and Mother?" Colleen had a good idea."What we COULD do.
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