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She was starting to show signs of age, with wrinkles and a few grey hairs. People generally found her to be warm and friendly, but then again no one knew that much about her. She had moved when she had grown up. No one was really sure why anyone lived there. She liked living in this little town out in the English countryside. She wasn’t married and she lived alone. Her job was simple and hardly caused her any stress. Very little happened and that was the way she liked it. Not like when she was growing up in London and she saw pretty much everything. Jane could get peace and quiet whenever she wanted it. She had come to the store as she was finally leaving for a vacation to Europe, and had no idea what would happen over there. After getting the more innocent items, she moved on to the adult section. She liked to have a less innocent evening once in a while. Why not? She started taking down videos… The 400 Blowjobs… The Sexorcist… XXXcitement… Wild Girls… Suddenly, something caught. The girls and the hunters all hung back for a moment, and then all jabbered at me for a while, trying to convince me that going another direction was a good idea. Me, I'm a genius, so I ignored them and continued on. Once we were in that large stand of woods, they all got VERY quiet and moved slowly and carefully. Of course me, being the utter genius that I am, I ignored all their fear and caution. Real goddamned smart, I am. I was wondering if they were worried about forest hogs, or something. Man, was I wrong. After wandering around for a little while, seeing nothing unusual in particular, three things happened in rapid succession. One, I tripped over an exposed root and fell forward into a very large pile of semi-warm goop. Second, as I rolled out of the goop I realized that the 'goop' was a four foot wide, two foot high pile of manure and that the 'root' I had tripped over was not a root, it was a tusk. The tusk was about ten feet long. Ten feet. Allow me to write that one more.
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