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"I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though, and some kale chips."When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and study the Constitution.In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half- dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age," an. She felt a little jealous because she knew from admiring her own toned form in the mirror that she would look great in them too.Then a few months ago, Reed had been droning on about his latest science projects and Sue had felt a tingle of excitement when he mentioned a perception filter that could allow a person to assume the perfect disguise for prolonged periods. It projected a sort of holographic "skin" that would completely mask a person's own appearance. The appearance could be changed to almost anything, limited only by the user's imagination.Sue's heart had fluttered with excitement. That very morning she had been posing in front of the bedroom mirror, trying on some of her raciest underwear and fantasizing about a room full of eager eyes appreciating her lovely form. Now here was a way she could relive those days without having to compromise her reputation and standing.As soon as she could get some time alone, she had gone to the perception filter and set up her own secret.
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