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”:)Two women police dog handlers are on the beat, one says “I’m cold I left my knickers at the station.”The other one says “let the dog have a sniff of your fanny and he’ll fetch them.”The dog returned 20 minutes later with her knickers and truncheon two broom handles and 3 of the desk sergeants fingers.An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are working on a sky scraper, the Englishman opens his sandwich box and exclaims “Bloody hell, ham and cheese again! I swear, if I have ham and cheese again tomorrow, i’m going to throw myself off this building!”The Scotsman then proceeds to open his sandwich box and exclaims “Aye, I’ve got fucking chicken mayo again, if I have this tomorrow i’ll throw myself off this building as well!”The Irishman opens his lunch and says “I’ve got bacon again! If I have bacon again tomorrow, i’ll join you in jumping off this building!”So the next day the three men open their sandwich boxes and all have the same filling as the day before, so they all proceed. That's only fair." His voice quieted to a mere whisper. "Just don't say 'blood' or 'vampire' here. We don't really take kindly to the latter term, and some of them are hungry after their daily sleep. See, this is equivalent to about your lunch time for us."Whut. We? Us? We who? We you? We me? We them? Wha-wha? I became befuddled.Jack grinned kindly. "I know man, I should have told you beforehand. Don't think me different just because I'm 'undead' as you'd call it." His voice quieted again. "Oh, and if you want to say 'the V word', please replace it with third-shift-worker or late-night-partier or something like that… be creative. Some of them—particularly Derek" —he motioned toward a man at the far end of the bar—"hate the term, thanks to the movie industry. It's a racial slur. Other than that, be yourself! We're socially no different."I returned to my senses, enlightened by his speech, though still uneasy. "Ok, you're not shitting me… you're seriously a va—yama-pomma-llama….
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