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Then one day, she didn't show up at her usual time. Roger waited and waited all that day, telling himself that she'd merely been delayed, and that she would come eventually. But that day became another one, then turned into a week, and finally stretched to a full month. There was no explanations, no contact, nothing that he could grasp in his desperate bid for understanding. With her departure, so too departed all that he had gained. He reverted back to not eating, not exercising, and not caring whether he lived or died. Slowly but surely, he became a mere shell of a man again. And once again, the public health people invaded his lowly refuge. They returned him to that hated institution, ran medical test after medical test on him, and subjected him to interview after interview. Roger fought to escape the mindless searching that they inflicted upon him, determined to once again find that state of catatonic indifference that gave him relief from the memories, from the frustrations, from. .. I dunno. The first answer is that it feels good." How does it feel?" Nicole said."Well, I can't ... I can't answer that." Why not? You've done it. You should know what it feels like." Yes, but it's hard to describe," Elle said, "and also I think it might be different for each person." Oh." If you really do want to find out, what you should do is masturbate," said Elle."Masturbate," said Nicole. "You mean ... Touch myself." Yeah," said Elle."Yeah," said Nicole, looking away, "that's what ... Well. Someone suggested that." Oh?" said Elle, curious. "Who?" Who else had Nicole talked to about this?Nicole looked a little guilty. "Umm..." You can tell me," said Elle, smiling."Umm ... David," Nicole said."Oh," said Elle. Well, of course. Who else would she trust? Heck, I wish he were here—it'd be easier on all of us. "Well, you can trust him, I think," she said. "He gives good advice. And I doubt he'll go blabbing about it to anyone else." Yeah," said Nicole. "Does ... Does it feel good?".
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