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One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct.Not more than five minutes later, I heard herReporting to the rest of the family that he hadDied of a ‘massive internal fart.’Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg4. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ‘How long have you been bedridden?’After a look of complete confusion she answered...‘ Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.’Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR5. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB.I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams ... To cover my embarrassmentI had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughingAnd further embarrassing me.I looked up from my work and sheepishly said...‘ I’m sorry. Was I tickling you?’She replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard...‘ No. Jerry I was afraid he would hurt her but she wouldn't come."Oh, Jerry, I'm so sorry I yelled at you. It's just that I remembered when you took her out before we began dating. I had loved you for years and you were dating my sister. I actually thought I hated her for that. I was so angry with you I could hardly talk to you or be in the same room with you. Eddie brought all those memories back this morning and the hurt and anger came back. I'm so sorry Honey. I can't believe he didn't know you used to date though. I wonder why he got so upset over those old pictures?"Well, now I knew why Roxie had been so nasty to me back then. I guess I could understand her feelings. I wrapped her in my arms and told her it was ok. "Honey, I love you. I am nice to Janice because she is your sister, heck, I suppose I even like her ok but we could never be more than that. We are like oil and water and you know it. We just don't get along that well."Roxie smiled and gave me a gentle kiss. She said, "I.
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