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I wasn't looking forward to what was to come. In fact, I dreaded it. My conversation with Ginny had helped, but I still couldn't imagine how this was all going to turn out.I didn't have a second drink. I don't think I could have held it down. I needed all my wits about me. Alcohol was only false courage. Ginny taught me that. She was an alcoholic. A recovering alcoholic. It had cost her her marriage and her relationship with her children. It had been a very high price to pay. I met her not long after she joined AA. I admired her courage. She blamed no one but herself and knew it was a sickness. She dealt with it.I had no such excuse for my behavior. I was selfish. It all boiled down to that. It was always about what I wanted. I had been blind to it just as Ginny had been blind to her alcoholism. Howard's harsh words had jolted me and forced me to admit to my self-centered behavior. But I could change. I knew I could change. It wouldn't even be hard. I'd just have to be more. I moved my hand quickly to the top of the ass cheek closest to me. I did it quick so I did not chicken out.Feeling her firm but soft cheek in my hand was more than I could take. But, just as I was thinking about pulling down the panties she squirmed in her sleep. This scared me and I jumped up and again ran to my room. When I got there I cussed myself out for being such a shit realizing that she had not even awakened. I was disappointed as the next night my SIL evidently succeeded in making love with my Brother as I heard the sounds of fucking coming from their room. Naturally, SIL did not appear on the couch that night. But, even worse I did not find her there for the next week. Finally, my chance came one night after I heard them fighting. I even heard her call him a “frigid son of a bitch.” Sure enough an hour later there she was in that sexy shortie nightie spread out on the couch. I felt like a man on a mission; the freedom of the whole world depended on whether or not I fucked.
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