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"Well, there was this one decision I made, but I can't get into that right now."You know, my wife used to do all that sort of stuff for us. She always knew exactly what she wanted and how things were supposed to be done. 'There's always a right way to do something.' she'd say. "Now she's gone and I can't even figure out what kind of nail polish to wear. You'd think I was a blonde or something."I guess I should have expected her to leave, but I didn't. Sort of came out of the clear blue sky. One minute she's there and the next minute she isn't and that's all th-th-that's all folks. I guess I shouldn't talk about it like that but I can't get too serious about it because it still hurts. Oh boy does it still hurt."I still love her. But I don't think she understands that."What I don't understand is how she could leave me. I mean, just because this shirt buttons one way and another shirt buttons another way, what's the BFD? I mean really, I don't understand. Is it that big a deal that I. Not without possibly reawakening horrible memories that would destroy her again. It wasn't just the rape he was worried about. If she remembered killing her rapist, he knew it would torment her for the rest of her life. She was just that kind of person. At the same time, he couldn't live a lie with her. If he did that, and THEN she remembered her past ... it would destroy them both.By the time he picked her up for dinner, he'd thought about it most of the day. He had to get her to talk to Claire. It was the only thing he could do. At least then, if she remembered, she'd be with a professional, who could deal with the trauma.She met him with a kiss and the loin rubbing she was so good at, which made him erect almost instantaneously."Mmmmm," she said into his lips. "You DID miss me." I always miss you," he said."Why haven't we gotten married?" she asked him.It was questions like that that brought his world crashing down around him ... and deflated his erection as quickly as it had.
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