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How I fell in love with this ugly duckling and by the power of my love alone, transformed her into a diamond in the rough. Well, to fit any more clichés into a sentence would not only be a crime against English majors everywhere but it would also be completely against my character. You see, I?m a letch; a down and dirty foul-minded letch. Let me explain a bit further?this girl and I, we work together at a catholic mission. I grew up in the church. I know all the rhetoric and while I decided early in my life that none of it was for me, I also found that the contacts it lent me and the positions that it granted me were enough to stay within the warm bosom of the organization despite my hypocrisy. Another thing I had discovered was that it granted me access to pussy. When I was eighteen I not only took the virginity of a devote patron at the church I was then working as an assistant at, but I also was able to completely transform her into a wanton slut who later, I found out, could not. He was allegedly insanely possessive of histrophy/breadwinner wife and had punched out more than one guy who hadgotten a little too friendly with Cassie in her husband's presence. It'sno wonder so many of these laughably-mismatched celebrity couples getdivorced so soon. I couldn't figure out why they got together in thefirst place. I swear, they must hook up in a chat room onCareerBuilder.com. As far as I was concerned, the clock started tickingon Cassie Spire's marriage the moment she vowed "I do." Mr. Muscles herewas certainly doing everything he could to hasten the countdown - or sohe thought.I instantly regretted my previous words to him; Dick must haveinterpreted them as a green light. I didn't even get the chance to gointo Damage Control mode (I winced at that choice of words). Dick pickedme up, cradling me in his powerful arms as he carried me towards thedarkened 'conversation pit' at the back of the VIP room. Cindy had toldme stories of the goings-on in that dimly-lit.
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