’ ‘You told her-‘ ‘I told her she was perfectly safe and you were a perfect gentleman – unless she wanted you in bed, in which case she was in for a treat.’ ‘Thanks a lot, Ian.’ ‘You’re very welcome.’ — ‘You awake?’ ‘Hi Harriet. Yes, I’m wide awake – it’s only ten o’clock.’ ‘I’ve had a long phone call with a Sandra Christleton, but you’ll have expected that. We had a good chat. I told her how good you’ve been to me. I made sure she knew that you never tried anything until I moved on you. She sounds nice, and she’s in hell. You’ve got to help her, Graham.’ ‘How’s things with Kieran?’ ‘We’re feeling our way. He’s changed, Graham, more serious.’ ‘He’s grown up. He needed to leave you to realise what was important. Yes?’ ‘I hope so. It’ll be a while before I feel totally confident in him. I think it’ll work. You will help her, won’t you?’ ‘My offer’s there, it’s up to her whether she takes it.’ ‘She sounds nice. Vulnerable though. I hope we can all meet her. She’ll need friends, living in. She had inserted a video in the middle so my exposure was even more limited.Unbeknownst to the presenter, Peggy and Pru Brewster were in attendance for my star turn. I don’t know of anything that makes you feel much grander than a mother and auntie telling you, “Well done, Birdie, really well done.”One lunchtime puzzlement. At the Unicorn Club, Ms. Sloane turned the conver. to The McGovern, “I like that girl, Birdie, she’s a sharp one.”Yes, she is that. And I like Trish too. But the war footing intent is to get me out from under the crossed hairs of the wedding sniper’s aim, if I make myself lucid.Last year, at our office Christmas party — it’s a real bash, catered, three open bars — things got pretty giggly. But do not worry, yrs. truly did not, as they say in some circumstances, sample the merchandise.Auntie Pru gave me a gentle reminder, “Keep your fucking hands to yourself, Birdie.”My sainted mother, “Keep it in your pants, Birdie.”Being on Triple A best Behavior did not preclude.
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