He looks calculating and confused at the same time. I quirk an eyebrow at him while I chew, but he doesn’t say anything. Eventually Ethan and I say goodbye to his friends and hop in his car so he can take me home. After I buckle my seatbelt, I turn my body towards him as he starts the car. I tuck my left foot behind my right and put my hands in my lap. When he glances at me I give him a small smile, then look out the windshield. From my peripherals I can tell he’s grinning at me. I’m still tingling from where his hand was earlier, and I’m surprised when I feel my cheeks go pink. He’s so exceptional, it’s terrible. As he cruises through the streets, he deftly, yet deliberately places his hand on my left thigh. I smile at the window and my hand finds his, holding it in my lap. We don’t say anything, but the car is filled with our unspoken happiness. His hand so close to the spot he was assaulting earlier causes my thigh muscles to involuntarily flex. Ethan’s hand squeezes me in. I can write all this down and get away withit, but if I were to try and say it out loud the necklace would chokeme, even kill me if I really rebelled. It might seem like magic but infact it is merely one of the marvels of technology that our unlovelygovernment keeps coming up with.My eyes really are brown, and the jewellery and accessories are realenough, but my looks are a fake. My hair is a wig, a very real lookingone, but a wig. My breasts are pads inside a bra, and my body has beenpadded expertly inside these clothes that I wear to make me appearfemale. And I dread what my *mother* will want done to my body in thelong term. I wonder what my friends would think if they knew thateverything I say and every move I make is all an act? That I hatetalking about boys and other girly stuff with them and that I long towipe the lipstick from my lips, shed my girl disguise and get back tomy parents so that they know that I didn't die after all.I don't hate the boyfriend that I'm lumbered.
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