”“Am I?” I asked. “Do you remember what I said at graduation?”“Wanting to fuck me had NOTHING to do with wanting to marry me!” she protested.“Don’t revert to that thinking, Jos! You admitted you were afraid of wrecking our relationship. You used that whole ‘brother-sister’ thing as a defense mechanism!”Jocelyn sighed, “OK, that part is true, but be honest. You wanted to fuck someone, anyone!”“And yet...” I said, having learned from my mom.“You didn’t do it with Carol because, in the end, you didn’t WANT to do it just to do it. But you had planned to do it with Emmy before we decided to do it. And you did it with her. And with Becky.”“Things changed.”“What if the accident hadn’t happened?”“I’d already decided I wasn’t going to do it with Emmy, and if I hadn’t done that, then Becky wouldn’t have overheard the conversation with my mom. And I probably wouldn’t have tried to get serious with Nancy. And probably wouldn’t have got back together with Melody, if I’d even gone with her in the. She wanted him to take her in his arms, pull her down on top of him, and smother her endlessly with all the loving kisses possibly in the world. Ohhhhhh my lord Chad, turn over. Turn over and look at me. I can’t believe I’m doing this. Not even for you, Chad. Turn over. Come on, look at me Chad. Look at me and see how I look right now, she thought as she felt like mouthing the words as if that would do something more extraordinary then usual. Oh god Chad, she started to think, look at me. Look at my body Chad. I’m almost naked. Can you believe it? I’m almost completely naked right now. Here I am, my dress is unbuttoned, you can see my bra and underwear, and I want you to see me like this. I do, Chad. I really, really do. Tell me how beautiful I am. I ma beautiful aren’t I Chad? She gave up. She started buttoning it all back up. She became a little downtrodden about it all and after the third button, she saw him shuffle more then she expected. She stopped buttoning up. She waited,.
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