It started spreading out into my offline world. I started walking down the street with my head held higher. Gradually with Rick’s words ringing in my ears, the laughter and stares no longer triggered me to think they were talking about me. I noticed more glances in my direction from men. I started making more of an effort with my appearance. Making sure my hair and make-up were done before leaving the house. Instead of baggy oversized clothes, I wore outfits that showed off my hourglass figure. I wasn’t under any illusion, I knew I wasn’t going to be the next top cat walk model, or win any Miss World competitions. But I had accepted that some people could find me attractive, and that the body image I had, did not match what others saw in me. Rick and my other brilliant, close friends that I had made on Lush, were always there to pick me up if I had bad day. Without them a year on, with Helens twenty ninth birthday drinks just passed, I probably wouldn’t have the following story to. “Oh shit! Sorry, I forgot to tell you. We split up after you and Beth went back to the island two weeks ago. She was nagging me about moving in. I told her I wasn’t ready for a live-in girlfriend and that I’d do the asking when I was.”“She got the shits with me, finally, and she told me to get stuffed. Her crap was gone when I got home that night. I haven’t even bothered to ring her, and she hasn’t called me. Brian said she was sucking on some guys face in the bar last weekend, but I didn’t go upstairs.”Ryan shrugged, and I asked why he had smiled when I gave him the ring? He grinned. “Tanya’s face came into my mind. I was going to give Indy the flick. I even told her after you gave me the rings that I didn’t love her and only wanted to be friends, but I don’t think she believed me.”“I knew it would be a couple of months before I could come and find out where Tanya was, so I let Indy stick around until she worked out, she wasn’t going to get what she wanted. Probably not my proudest.
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