Winter was thus the time when I thought most about the life I had lost. Specifically, I thought about my daughter, now estranged to me thanks to my ex-wife. I had no idea where they were, the last known address was in Sioux Falls, but that had been three years earlier. I lamented the fact that I had missed my daughter’s high school career, that I was not able to teach her how to drive, that I was not able to watch her grow from the little girl who had sat happily in my lap while I read Disney books into a young woman who would likely do great things during her lifetime. Winter was when the tears came, when the gray strands became more prominent, when the darkness of the night mirrored the despair of my soul. ***** Early in the springtime of my sixth year at Faller’s Forest, a television production crew came to interview me. They were looking for stories about the ‘forgotten side’ of racing: the life of a volunteer trackside worker, for example, without whom no race could safely. "Yeah sure, I'll see you both then." Okay, see you then. Bye, honey." Bye," I said as the phone clicked on the line. Normally I'd be excited to see them, especially you know who, but something wasn't right. I'd rarely heard Sally talk that way, normally she'd laugh with me but it was all too serious. So, with my curiosity piqued, I headed into the shower and did several uninteresting things before heading to bed.Happily, Friday is a day off, so the pricks at the office were making their own drinks today. Although, to be honest, I could've done with a distraction because all day long I kept thinking about the impending visit and wondering what it could possibly all be about.I had another shower at around five and put a loose dress on, a nice knee-length floral green dress (bad girl for life) and waited for them to arrive and even though I'd been waiting for them all day, the speaker on my door still scared the shit out of me when it beeped to let me know someone was pushing the buzzer.
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