'Then He went to the French and said, 'I have Commandments.'The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.''Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'Finally, He went to the Jews and said, 'I have Commandments... ''Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?''They're free.''We'll take 10.'There. That, should piss off just about everybody...IN RESPONSE TO ALL THE RECENT E-MAILS ABOUT OUR DOG: PLEASE BE ADVISED, WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT HIM.YES, HE BIT SIX PEOPLE WEARING TRUDEAU T-SHIRTS, FOUR PEOPLE WEARING KATHLEEN WYNNE T-SHIRTS, TWO CAR DRIVERS WITH RAP MUSIC BLARING FROM THEIR VEHICLES, NINE TEENAGERS WITH PANTS HANGING PAST THEIR ASS CRACKS, THREE FLAG BURNERS, AND A PAKISTANI UBER DRIVER.AND FOR THE LAST TIME ... THE DOG IS NOT FOR SALE!NO, I DO NOT APPROVE OF HIS SMOKING, BUT HE SAYS IT HELPS GET THE "BAD TASTE" OUT OF HIS MOUTH.The following is a thought piece, it is not your interest, don't read. The computer was rejecting all of my fantasies. When my final "perfect woman" disappeared from the screen, the computer clicked off and re-started. The original programme re-appeared on the screen. This time though I wasn't even touching the keyboard. I watched as the "age" box flashed up and a tick appeared in the the sixty plus section. Next the "height" section, five feet four was selected automatically. I sat and watched as the computer went through the whole programme, hair colour, eye colour until finally the select box appeared. I sat waiting for the next set of instructions, but they didn't appear. Instead, the select icon just flashed at me.I waited for five minutes, but still the screen flashed. Finally I pressed the select button and waited to see what would happen. Nothing. I pressed the select again, but still no response. I was about to log off the computer, when I heard a movement behind him. I swivelled my chair round and my mouth dropped open. Sitting on my unmade.
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