A. GIRL," dad insists. "Some people are born the wrong gender,and Nikki just happens to be one of those people. Now YOU can eitheraccept it, or we'll go home and spend Christmas by ourselves." But- but it's not healthy," grandma pleads."Nikki's been happier and healthier than she's been in years," mum sayssmugly. "She's doing well at college, she has a group of friends whocare deeply about her, she's even more physically fit than she was 12months ago." She doesn't look happier," granddad snorts."That's because her grandparents are standing in judgement over her onChristmas Day," dad retorts. "Also, 'she' doesn't look happier?" Oh, um," granddad blurts, backtracking at having been caught out.Seeing that her argument is falling apart, grandma comes up to me andspeaks to me, face-to-face."Nick," grandma says softly."Nikki," I whisper."N-Nikki," grandma stutters. "Is- is this what you really want? I needyou to tell me honestly. Are you being forced to do this?" Of course not," I sniffle,. Don't be drawn into it, Ed. Let her talk herself out."Well?"There was nothing to say. Nothing that would help."Was I just the rectum du jour?" After a minute. "I bet you thought I was awfully easy. But you see, I never fell for anyone before."When she said that she dropped the tough-girl act and started crying again, in the middle of the last sentence. A tear meandered down her face, through the drops projected onto her from the window."You were the first one."Oh Jesus. Have you ever really hurt anyone? I did her good. I'd known, but it's different knowing it and seeing her keep hurting in front of you. It was as bad as when she caught us. No time had passed at all. Something, a song lyric, some words swirling around in here about the one you always hurt. You son of a bitch."Well, I'm sorry to ruin your perfect night. I'm sure I've completely embarrassed myself. I'll be going now." She picked up her coat and started for the door."No!" Don't say it!"Good-bye." Don't go!" Shut the fuck.
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